My Writing Process Experiences

I think one of the most important things that I've learned while taking this class is the improvement of how I word things. I stated at the beginning of this course that I'm not very good at putting words down on paper to reflect what I'm thinking. Well I think with the writing process that I've done (examples of different outlines and prewriting rough drafts), I've learned to grasp a better sense on combining the necessary words and forming the correct sentences.

I think with this semester, I've used more prepositions in descriptions. I think back on what I've written in the past in other classes and I don't think I did a lot of that. I think with using more of the preposition format, I've made my writing more intriguing and has improved my writing skills.

I think I've improved on editing a rough draft and also on my final copies as well. I use to have a major problem of not creating new paragraphs of new subjects. I used to jumble many various things into one area and in which would help me not make any sense and to question where the focus is at. I also think I've been more descriptive in my writing which helps with supporting the topic of the paper and makes the paper more interesting to read. I do think I still need to touch up on not writing too much of one thing though. Like I've mentioned before, sometimes I get carried away with wording and can write too much of unnecessary things down when I let my wording ramble. (like now) I also KNOW I need to improve on the correct MLA work cited format. A bit confusing, but hopefully with more practice, I'll be able to be more knowledgeable with that as well.

I think the strongest paper I wrote was the memorable piece that described the tragic day of my abandonment from my adoptive parents. I've always loved writing short stories and narrative pieces. So naturally, when I first learned about the assignment, I dove in enthusiastically. I put a lot of feelings and emotions into that paper to reflect how it affected me as a child. I had hoped that who ever had read it would be intrigued and affected by what they saw. I think it worked by the reviews I recieved from my peers.

I think the weakest paper I wrote was the evaluation one that picked apart the movie, "Passion of the Christ." Oops me turned the paper in late and therefore, I wasn't satisfied with whipping up the paper at the last minute and felt I could of done a lot better. But I wanted to turn it in in a timely manner and in doing so, tried to make the evaluation as intellegient as possible. Well I learned that I did the horrible habit of writing too much of one subject and not enough of another. That right there shows that I still need to improve on knowing when to describe something and how much I should explain of it. I also struggled with trying to make it an evaluation of the movie to convince the readers of why the movie was great. I thought it would be an easy task but at times, was hard when I noticed that in my rough draft, I would tend to make it a more personally writing piece of what I thought, and not pointing out the stronger points of the movie to support the evaluating thesis.

The one paper that I think I would of redone was research paper on adoption. The more I think about, it the more I agree with the instructor's dislike of the format approach of the who, what, where, when, why, and how. I struggled with how I was going to lay out the research paper at the time, that seemed to be the only solution. I agree that I should of went a different route and I do wish I wouldn't of done that format at all.

"Ordinary People" - John Legend

JOHN LEGEND LYRICS
"Ordinary People"

[Verse 1] Girl I'm in love with you, this ain't the honeymoon, past the infatuation phase. Right in the thick of love, at times we get sick of love, it seems like we argue everyday.

I think the first part of the lyric is very raw and straight to the point. It states the reality of how real love is discovered after the infatuation passes at the beginning of a new relationship. Many people mistaken infatuation as being "in love." But the many dating experts discover that real love can be discovered after the first initial giddiness and butterflies pass. The ending part of the verse says how a love/hate relationship can feel. When times are tough, being "in love" can feel impossible when negative energy is present in a struggling relationship, even if the love in the relationship is heightened by strong and emotional connections.

[Bridge] I know I misbehaved and you made your mistakes and we both still got room left to grow. And though love sometimes hurts, I still put you first, and we'll make this thing work but I think we should take it slow.

This explains how a person can admit their flaws and wrong doings. He also states how the couple can learn from their mistakes and improve on what they've done wrong. He also states that love can be painful and how he still puts his woman first no matter what the situation is. I get the feeling that he knows what unconditional love is but in order to show it, he feels that things should progress in a slow motion in order to fix any problems. Admiting that something has gone wrong in a relatinship is always a healthy step to fixing a problem, or in this verse, a wounded heart.

[Chorus] We're just ordinary people. We don't know which way to go. Cuz we're ordinary people. Maybe we should take it slow. (Take it slow oh oh ohh) This time we'll take it slow. (Take it slow oh oh ohh) This time we'll take it slow.

The impression that I get from this is the vulnerability the guy is feeling as a person. He understands and wants the other person to understand that he's a human being of flesh and blood. Many people learn from their mistakes through life's experiences, wether good or bad. I feel that in order for someone to find their own identity and be comfortable in their own skin, they have to learn from life's experiences through mistakes and heart aches. In this verse, he seems to understand that he's like everyone else. He's not a flawless human being and in order for him to stop making the mistakes in the troubled relationship, he needs to take his time to growing and learning from them. (and vice versa)

[Verse 2] This ain't a movie, no. No fairy tale conclusion ya'll. It gets more confusing everyday. Sometimes it's heaven sent, then we head back to hell again. We kiss then we make up on the way.

This verse explains the reality of a REAL relationship. Many people would like to have the fairy tale story of being saved and swept off their feet by a heroic prince/princess. But in the real world, a relationship can have plenty of fire breathing dragons, wort infested toads, and many tortureous hurdles to go through in order to be happy. The ending part of the verse also explains the ups and downs of relationships. How one minute people can feel like they're walking on air with the high feeling of being in love. Then the next minute, their life can feel shattered with a broken heart until the crumbled bridges in the relationship can be mended again.

[Bridge] I hang up, you call. We rise and we fall and we feel like just walking away. As our love advances, we take second chances. Though it's not a fantasy, I still want you to stay.

This explains the frustrations of how to deal with problems and with each other. Sometimes peoples' emotions can get the best of them and many people spontaneously think with their heart and not with their brain. At times when things may seem overwhelming and doesn't seem like things are going to improve in a relationship, the feeling of throwing in the towel can over ride the logical part of trying to solve a problem or trying to end a fight in a healthy way.
[Chorus]

[Verse 3] Take it slow. Maybe we'll live and learn, maybe we'll crash and burn, maybe you'll stay, maybe you'll leave, maybe you'll return. Maybe another fight, maybe we won't survive, but maybe we'll grow. We never know baby you and I.

This verse is so clear on how there are many risks when being in love. Many people take chances in trying to be in love and trying to make love work. This person seems to understand the many ending possibilies that could occur after each fight, or after each mistake is made. He also seems to understand that he doesn't know what the outcome of their relationship is, but he's willing to gamble with his heart. He's willing to continue to be a fool in love.

** I absolutely love this song. When I heard it for the first time on the radio, I thought the lyrics were raw and real. John Legend did such a great job in explaining how being in love can affect a relationship. I think the lyrics are straight to the point and I also feel that he has an original style of writing that I haven't seen in other musicians in a very long time. **

Plan on Revision of Research Paper

As I've stated before; writing a research/informative paper isn't exactly my cup of tea. I'm not very confident in putting facts, information, statistics, and own personal words together to making a paper or a subject make sense. So before I had started my research paper on adoption, I hesitated and held my breath before diving head in first. The thesis paragraph was a cinch, the rest.....ehhhh...could of been better.

As much as I hate my own criticism after completing a hard working piece of anything, I do appreciate opinions and criticism from instructors, teachers, etc. I've always been a fan of literature and writing and if I can learn something new from my own instructor, I greatly do appreciate the negative/positive responses.

When I read over my rough draft, I wasn't surprised of the many revision suggestions that my instructor had commented on. One thing that I did agree with along side his suggestion was not being that enthusiastic of making the outline of the paper into a "question style content." I did the typical Who, What, Where, When, How form and believe me, that form wasn't the first thought that came through my mind when figuring out how my paper was going to be layed out. I struggled with the outline for a day or two and finally settled on the form. I'm not exactly thrilled about it but I felt it was the only route to go with how I wanted my informative paper to be perceived.

I took everything that my instructor suggested in changing certain things in my rough draft to heart. I may not be the best writer, but in my eyes, I try to be a perfectionist and if I can improve my paper, then damn it, I'll revise the whole paper if needed! One thing that I'm not exactly thrilled about is matching the facts/statistics that I had located to the sources that I had found. I have some long hours ahead of me because of the mistake of throwing away all the information that I had collected when I had finished the rough draft. So unfortunately, I'm going to have to research again for my final draft....yeah.

Even though I have some revision and touching up to do on my research paper, I'm looking forward to the finished product. I'm always thrilled to improve in what I lack and I'm always thrilled in improving my writing style and techniques.

Processing

When I write a paper or complete an assignment, I'm very good in thinking things through and attempt to be a perfectionist. I tend to read and re-read things over before I submit a completed assignment. Sometimes it can be nerve wrecking at times because I've been known to re-write things more than just a couple of times on the first draft just because of how unsatisfied I was with the appearance and how I worded things.

I do know I need to work on not being a procrastinator and try to give myself enough time to complete work. I tend to give myself a heavier work load towards the due dates then what it would of been originally if I completed my work at the first notice.

I tend to struggle with creating a persuasive paper that makes sense. I'm not very good at trying to express my opinions intellectually and with plenty of information to support my theories/thesis. I think sometimes I put too much emotion into a persuasive paper and in which can get me to sidetrack in the paper and jumble things around to making my instructor(s) raise a question mark after reading.

I think what I've learned most in this class is how to transition myself from writing one form of an assignment to going completly the opposite way. The first assignment was more narrative and personal. After completing the paper, then the informative assignment arose and in which made me have to change my way of thinking on what I wanted my paper to look like. I had transition myself in sounding more informative and factual in what I had to say instead of expressing feelings and emotions. It took me a minute or two but I think I successfully completed it.

Polygamy Outrage

I have found it appalling to follow up on the Polygamy story that involves over 400 children, parents and the wrongful teachings of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. When I had first read about the raid the protective services had conducted to take away all of the children, I was very disturbed to found out the reasonings behind it all. To find out that girls were forced into underage marriage and to hear of the parents that willing allowed it made me sick to my stomach. I can't believe that a mother would allow her own 13 yr old daughter to say wedding vows to a man that could be old enough to be her father! Let alone say the sacred vows in the eyes of God and to shameless approve of the wrongful marriages.

It states in the article how all of the children were returned to their parents. As much as I would like to rejoice for the parents, I feel disturbed and wonder on how the children feel. Even though their time away from their parents were short, they had enough time to experience the finer things in life such as tv and video games that were considered sinful in their religious world. Many were placed in foster homes and as traumatic of an experience for a child to not have their mother around, I tend to wonder if it actually took a different affect on them. For the older children that are more aware of their surroundings such as the age of 10 yrs old, how do they feel now? I wonder how they feel of being placed in a foster home, experiencing many different things that were't allowed at the sect and then to be placed back into the world that we, as society, frown down upon. I tend to wonder what type of emotional distress have formed and how much of a damage the relationship between the parents and the child has been created. I'm sure more than half of the children are fully aware of how the media has responded about their religion, what may have occured at what they had considered home and maybe have started to question what is right and wrong in God's eyes.

The church's teachings and ways of life have been frowned down upon and considered inhumane and injust. In the typical teachings of the Bible and religion, polygamy is not allowed. The prime example would be the first couple that were known as Adam and Eve. They were the approved Christian couple of 1 man and 1 woman. Not Adam having Eve as his wife, then also Alice, Mary, and Elizabeth. Another example would be Jesus's parents, Mary and John. It never states in the Bible of John having any more wives then Mary and therefore society should live their life as the Bible's examples of a 1 man and 1 woman union.

The media has exploited this tragic story. But have you noticed that most of the time, the stations like CNN or MSNBC talk about the court battles the parents are experiencing or how the parents want their children back? What about the children? Has anyone considered how they truly feel? Has anyone considered if the children even want to go back to their parents and back to the church's teachings? Has anyone considered on how the effect of foster homes are to the children? As much as a child should be with their parents, in this prime example, the parents don't deserve to have their children. For them to allow the many sins of rape, abuse, and forcing children to marry their own blood doesn't show true love and protection. I have an 8yr old daughter. I have NEVER had the desire for my daughter to marry someone thats twice her age when she hits maturity. Heck, I don't even want her to marry until she's at least close to 30 and thats only if she's ready and willing. I think the parents should be ashamed of themselves for allowing so much pain onto these children and to allow the wrong teachings of their religion to take control of their corrective parenting skills. God wants every one to love one another, not to hurt and force upon things against peoples' will.

Reflection on Reflective Assignment

For the first English 131 assignment, I was very interested in the Reflective paper due. I've always enjoyed writing narrative, and descriptive pieces. I think the reason is that as a person communicating to others, I tend to "talk too much" when describing an event, who I've met, or even what I've experienced. I tend to explain things using my 5 senses of what I see,hear,feel, touch, and smell. So when it comes to writing descriptions, it tends to be an easier task to me then other assignments like an informative or argumentative assignments. (sorry, Dave)

For my paper, I reaccured the event of being abandoned from my first adoptive family and the painful experience of being left behind. At first I had problems trying to figure out the best ways of explaining the event. I wondered at first if I should make the paper into an actual story and instead of explaining things, just use dialogues. But when I did my outline, I finally agreed on an approach of being more reflective and "past tense" then to make the paper into a full fledge story. I'm pretty happy with the way I finished it and I like the way I seem to be very expressive with my feelings. My emotions were pretty strong at the time of the event and I wanted the readers to see the pain that I had experienced.One of the comments I had received was someone questioning what the thesis was. He had stated that he didn't find it in the first paragraph. I do want to point out that I did make the thesis pretty clear in one of the last sentences in the first paragraph. I am glad that the readers have commented have all pretty much said the story was interesting and compelling, and in which I hoped to accomplish.

I'm pretty satisfied with the outcome of the paper but I do wish I could of gotten away with writing a little bit more. At first when I had written the story, the paper was about 7 pages long. But with the required amount of pages stated, I had to cut it down to 5. I do feel that I wish I could of made the story longer to explain a few more things and get more into depth. Such as specific things I had experienced from my mother of the abuse she had inflicted on me. Or even talk more about my second adoptive family and how much they had saved me from self destruction. If I was able to write the length that I had desired, I think I would of been 100% satisfied with the over all outcome.

Ugghhh.....gas prices!!

You know what really pisses me off??? (excuse the "french) The high and over the top gas prices. What the heck is going on with that? Over the weekend, I noticed that my local Kroger's gas station had $4.19 posted. Man, I went to fill my tank up from the 1/2 way mark and spent $46!!!!! My mouth dropped and thoughts of leaving the bill at the pump crossed my mind. Of course I paid the hefty amount but I became so irritated with the way our soaring gases have been.

When I got home, I vented to my husband about our so called great nation. Now I do love America and all that it has offered to someone like me that has traveled overseas to live a better life. But when I hear that there isn't a shortage of oil and these extremely high gas prices are by choice, it makes me sick. What the heck happened to the good ole days when a gallon cost a measly $.99? With my first Buick Avenue, it took only $20. Now ten yrs later, it takes $85 to fill my PT Cruiser and that makes a dent in my wallet.

Times like these is when I remind myself how the government isn't out there for us common, working class citizens. They say they can't control the greedy oil companies that are cashing in. What??? Pull the plug, investigate, make things change!! They also say all of our big oil tycoons from the Middle East are the ones hiking up the prices purposely. This should be a prime example of what happens when the U.S. government continues to stick their nose into unncessary business. I've never been in agreement with sending our troops to Iraq, Saudia Arabia, and every where else that seemed justified. The government and ignorant Mr. Bush needs to focus on more of our own homeland security and personal affairs. I don't call George Bush our "president." A real president is someone that leads his country for the benefit of the common citizens and lends a selfless hand to solving our own problems. Not someone like him who has used his own revenge to making the Iraq War possible and reaping in the high gas prices to fill his greedy pants. I can't stand that bastard!!! (Sorry, Dave) Who ever fills his shoes (Obama, hopefully) better change the government's ways and start looking out for us hard working common citizens and quit focusing so much on foreign affairs. Because our government continued to make more and more enemies overseas, people like my family have to put up with the consequences.

I'm sure this blog doesn't make any sense and I probably went away from the subject a few times. But man, I am pissed off and had to let a few thoughts out. Sorry if it seemed like a lot of rambling!!!